Wedding planning anxiety and stress is no joke. There’s proof on Pinterest with elaborate wedding planning timelines that will make your head spin. When you start to really get into the planning, you can find yourself at a total loss as to how all this minor details started coming into play.
The anxiety and stress of wedding planning can really take the fun out of it, especially if there’s hiccups in the planning process.
And, let’s not forget that now seems to be the moment that everyone wants their opinion heard from whether or not they even like your fiancé to wanting to be sure their newest dating venture (which started a week ago) is getting an invite to having to figure out a seating arrangement for the entire day that keeps your overly emotional, divorced parents separated.
Feeling that stress yet? Oh, yeah. I don’t even know the half of it and I’m feeling it for you.
That’s why in this article I’m walking you through several ways you can lower your blood pressure, reduce that wedding planning anxiety, and start having fun again.
Set days every week to work on wedding planning.
Don’t try wedding planning every day. When you do that, it’s easy to get completely absorbed in all the moving details of a wedding. Instead, choose one day of the week to dedicate to wedding planning.
In addition, set a time limit for yourself. There may be some things, like wedding dress shopping and fittings, that take up a big part of the day. However, it’s important to set a time limit so you can go out, unwind, and do other things.
And while we’re on the topic of time, try your best to stay ahead of your wedding planning timeline by a couple of weeks. If something ends up falling through or a crisis happens, you’ll have that cushion to rest and resolve.
Don’t stay glued to Pinterest.
Pinterest is a great resource for planning the aesthetics of the wedding, especially if you’re planning on DIY-ing a lot of decor.
However, once you’ve decided on the dress or the colors or the table centerpieces, get off Pinterest! Decision paralysis is real.
Stop looking once you’ve made a decision and commit to it. Going back and second guessing yourself and your style at this point will only lead to more stress and anxiety.
Feeling the stress yet? I don't even know the half of it and I'm feeling it for you. That's why I'm walking you through several ways you can reduce that wedding planning anxiety and start having fun again. Click To TweetKeep dates with your fiancé and vow not to talk wedding.
Once upon a time, you two were a couple that talked about things other than lace vs. chiffon and who hasn’t RSVP’d yet. Let’s get back to that.
Set dates every week where you two go out and do something fun that has nothing to do with wedding planning. Vow to not even bring it up during those dates.
Refocus on spending time with each other sans stress. In fact, these dates will most likely be a weekly source of stress relief when you two focus on connecting over scheduling!
Set firm boundaries with loved ones.
Biggest source of wedding stress: other people’s opinions. These “other people” could be your maid of honor, your future mother-in-law, your own mother. Anyone who wants a piece of the wedding planning.
It’s okay to set firm boundaries around the wedding during this time. In most cases, it’s necessary for keeping everyone’s sanity in tact until the Big Day.
Here are some ideas for for setting boundaries around the wedding:
- “I know this person is important to you and you would like to have them at my wedding. However, our budget doesn’t accommodate for adding more guests to our current list so we will not be adding them.”
- “I’m so glad to have you as a bridesmaid and I love hearing your input. The dress you want to wear doesn’t match the wedding theme. I’m sure you’ll look amazing in the dress you chose at another event. This is the dress I choose for the bridesmaids.”
- “I love your son so much and I can’t have him at the wedding. We decided that this is an adult-only event.”
- “I understand that *family relative* has been hurtful to you in the past. You both are important to me and I wish to have you both present for my wedding.”
- “I appreciate your input and I understand that you would/did things differently for your wedding. For my wedding, this is the direction I am going.”
Pro-Tip: Replace “but” with “and” when setting a boundary, particularly difficult ones. When we follow a statement with “but”, it dismisses the entire first half the sentence and can also make the other person feel dismissed (and less likely to be empathetic to the boundary). When we follow with “and”, we’re helping the other person feel acknowledged and heard while also stating our needs.
Focus on the marriage, not the wedding.
Easier said than done, especially when you’re already feeling so overwhelmed. Despite that, the classic saying of “A wedding lasts a day; a marriage lasts a lifetime” still rings true.
Set your focus on a making a mental shift into marriage and commitment, particularly during times of stress. Now is the best time to be turning towards your partner.
Be sure to be having the hard conversations. Focus on problem-solving as a couple. It’s not “right vs. wrong” or “you vs. me”. It’s “we” and “us”. Center on the problematic situation and how you two are going to solve it together, whether that be a minor stress or a relationship communication hiccup.
For a more fun option of getting into marriage mode, discuss things like family vacations, traditions, and how you two want to build your future together post-nuptials!
If you got value from this article, remember to share it with someone who could use it, too!
